How often have you been a victim of judgments of abandoning your child while you go for work? Or sent a pre-packet meal for lunch for the kid to school? We, as a woman are judged at every step we take. In today’s post, I am going to write about How to deal with Judgements.
I would be lying to you if I would say I never judged anyone ever. I have done that and passed snarky comments as well in the past. Every thought Why do we judge so much?
Judgments - How to deal with Judgements
Insecurity
One of the main reasons of judging others shows our own insecurities. When we are unsure of our actions, we try to validate ourselves by passing judgments.
It is very easy to hate a successful woman because somewhere inside I feel I am not as successful or good in what she does.
Fear
The best way to combat any fear, turn against it. When someone is a threat to us, it is natural that we would find reasons to go against that person.
If someone is doing some excellent work and we are afraid that they would overshadow our work. What do we do?? Enter mean girls, now judge the person, pass nasty snarky comments and tear the person down until they quit.
Loneliness
Ever bonded over Gossip? I am guilty of this too. It is much easier to talk about others and judge them for what they are doing wrong in their lives than to talk about our plans of improving and enjoying our lives happily.
Wanting What They Have
Most often we often judge people out of jealousy. We put them down because they have what we want to have.
Example: - someone’s got engaged – they are not right for each other. Someone get a job in a big firm and how you judge that she is not good enough for the role.
Stop Judging
Woman are still not equal for many people around the world. But you know who is doing the maximum discrimination? Women Indeed!!
Think about this : How much can we accomplish if we work together to support instead of tear each other ?
If women stood for each other, world would see us as Stronger sex.
Stop criticizing mother over breastfeeding or not breastfeeding or breastfeeding in public.
Stop criticizing other mothers for being a stay at home, working mom, a mom with single child or a mom with 3 kids.
Why do you want to judge other mothers? Specially when you have no idea on why she has taken that decision.
How to Stop Judging
Let me tell you a scenario: you are out to buy grocery and you saw another woman there, in her pajamas with hair tied unkempt. She is carrying a baby and buying some Maggi noodles, some frozen veggies and some other ready to eat meals. How would you judge her? (Tell me Honestly!!! )
How many of you thought she is lazy? But try putting yourself in her shoes. She could be having a bad day. She might have not been able to do anything since morning because of a crnaky baby, or may be she is struggling with acute depression.
I find this to be to best way to stop judging anyone. Thinking about the kind of struggles they are probably facing in the particular situation.
Do not jump to conclusion that people are bad. Look for some positive side of the person, think of may be they person need some sort of help.
Let me tell you, that lady you saw in pajamas in store was me. I have had days together when I lacked any motivation, enthusiasm or energy to dress up and comb my hair too.
What should we do - How to deal with Judgements
I think the first thing to not judging others is : find good in others. The next step we automatically stat finding good in ourselves and hence build confidence in ourselves. The confidence will support us and empower others, we would stop judging others.
If we women can support each other the gap of inequality will disappear in no time.
We all know, a happy woman would build better, happier and greater lives. Mothers who raise happy families contribute in multiple ways to the society.
Empower Each Other
Women groups
Have your own group of women where you support each other and not judge anyone. Build a close circle of your family and friends who will support you and not put you down.
Come be part of my Instagram Family
Reach for your dreams
We as women can do anything we want to do. We are not slaves in our house. If we decide to work towards our goals and dreams, we should not worry about people judging us.
Do not let any fear or failure stop you from reaching your dream.
Only when you aim for the stars you learn how to leap and jump.
Be an example to younger women and girls
Children learn more when they watch us. They learn from examples. If we act vulnerable and weak, they might feel it too.
Be an example to the young girls and women and show them that they can also achieve as you have. Guide them and be there to help.
Probably aim to inspire just 1 person per year of your life.
Women are all together in this. Women need to support other women instead of putting them down. Let us stop judging and start empowering!
Let me know in comments below How you deal with Judgements
This post is written as part of the BlogchatterA2Z challenge.
Insightful analysis of judgement and ways to deal with it. Difficult to avoid being judged. People judge based on their own prejudices and biases. Sometimes we have to just accept and go ahead. At least we can stop judging others.